Before my first Ironman, a friend told me:
Whatever happens, run your perfect race. (Thanks, Cary!)
Maybe it’s raining or it’s hot or cold or windy. Maybe you cramp up. Maybe your nutrition isn’t settling well in your stomach. Maybe your back aches or your legs are tired. Maybe you’re bonking. Maybe you just don’t want to go another mile.
You can’t control what happens out there, and whatever the conditions, whatever happens, however you might feel, you can always begin again.
In the week after Uberman, I ate peanut M&Ms every day because, well, why not? My foot was swollen. My shoulders ached. I still had cuts on my feet. The thought of training again was dreadful.
Then I decided to begin again. I did what I could – pushups from my knees because my arms couldn’t support my body weight, a few kettle bell swings and sit-ups. Soon my breath got heavy and my forehead beaded with sweat. I remembered the process. I remembered how this made me feel. I remembered why I chose to begin again.
Do the first ten minutes – meditation, writing, exercise or that project at work. Let your mind rest. Let your fingers flow. Let your feet walk. Let your body move. Let your voice speak. Draft the email. Make the first phone call. Write the first word. Start again at 2:37 in the afternoon, or 9:42 at night, or 3:14 in the morning when you can’t get back to sleep. Begin again right now.
Leave the room. Take a cold shower. Walk in the rain. Write a letter to tell her you’re sorry even if it’s not your fault. Ask how you can begin again together, because you already have.
Even if it is your fault – you did something stupid, you said something hurtful – you can’t unmake your mistake, but you can begin again with earnestness, humility and patience. Be grateful for the opportunity to start and learn the lesson for the next time you want to stop.
There will be no parades or roaring crowds, no applause or congratulations. No one is keeping score. The people that do won’t want you to win anyway.
Just begin again and be glad that you have, because once you start, you’re not at the beginning anymore.
I haven’t written since Friday. I got a late start Monday morning. Tuesdays can be tough because of a 7am standing call with clients. It’s now Wednesday morning and I find myself struggling to find my groove, so I’ll hit publish now so that I can begin again.